Come test read some of my game-related writing!
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Come test read some of my game-related writing!
http://testreadmystuff.blogspot.com/
Just finished this piece. Been showing it around to my friends lately, got some good feedback, showing it to you guys now. It's called nothing right now, but it is a written essay on stereotypical American video game characters. Haven't come up with a title yet, and I still have yet to shop it to some of my editor friends to see if they are interested in using it. It will not be posted and kept on blog spot once I get some feedback.
2356 words, written in about two days. Heavy brainstorming, hit a block, help me.
Some questions:
1) Should more characters be added or mention? Which ones?
2) Any facts seem off to you?
3) Does the whole thing come off as racist?
Also, a lot of this was written with a strong sense of sarcasm and irony. Just a heads up because some people can miss that stuff.
Just finished this piece. Been showing it around to my friends lately, got some good feedback, showing it to you guys now. It's called nothing right now, but it is a written essay on stereotypical American video game characters. Haven't come up with a title yet, and I still have yet to shop it to some of my editor friends to see if they are interested in using it. It will not be posted and kept on blog spot once I get some feedback.
2356 words, written in about two days. Heavy brainstorming, hit a block, help me.
Some questions:
1) Should more characters be added or mention? Which ones?
2) Any facts seem off to you?
3) Does the whole thing come off as racist?
Also, a lot of this was written with a strong sense of sarcasm and irony. Just a heads up because some people can miss that stuff.
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Hello Jim_Sensei, I just read your piece. I found it well written, and the only complain I have is the second paragraph... I found it out of place and somewhat distracting. I understand your point with it, and also feel that you wanted to fit it somewhere.. it always happens when we write something. It is somewhat fitting, but is the one that fits the less.
The other point of course is a conclusion. I don't feel a decent conclusion can be reached, and that might be your show stopper there. Or maybe you just need more development. When I've written a piece, I've always had the conclusion in mind before staring, and go backwards from it. Then I clear up some ideas in the way and maybe even modify or enrich the conclusion by it, but I've never worked the other way around. If that is your case I wouldn't know what to recommend. Otherwise, I'd recommend listing the relevant points of your conclusion and developing each into a paragraph, then find the themes they have in common and develop those. Maybe just a list of ideas and order them in a way that is logical to you, the rewrite all that is needed.
I don't regard it as racist, but I am neither American or Japanese =P. I do feel you need to put more characters in there though, since that would be the main body and you had a large introduction. I feel that the body should have more meat than the introduction. I feel that stronger cases are needed, in order to support your thesis.
The other point of course is a conclusion. I don't feel a decent conclusion can be reached, and that might be your show stopper there. Or maybe you just need more development. When I've written a piece, I've always had the conclusion in mind before staring, and go backwards from it. Then I clear up some ideas in the way and maybe even modify or enrich the conclusion by it, but I've never worked the other way around. If that is your case I wouldn't know what to recommend. Otherwise, I'd recommend listing the relevant points of your conclusion and developing each into a paragraph, then find the themes they have in common and develop those. Maybe just a list of ideas and order them in a way that is logical to you, the rewrite all that is needed.
I don't regard it as racist, but I am neither American or Japanese =P. I do feel you need to put more characters in there though, since that would be the main body and you had a large introduction. I feel that the body should have more meat than the introduction. I feel that stronger cases are needed, in order to support your thesis.
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I never really liked it, so I went ahead and removed it after hearing what you had to say. It was a filler paragraph added in to extend reading time, and outside of making little-to-no-sense, it wasn't funny at all.Hello Jim_Sensei, I just read your piece. I found it well written, and the only complain I have is the second paragraph... I found it out of place and somewhat distracting. I understand your point with it, and also feel that you wanted to fit it somewhere.. it always happens when we write something. It is somewhat fitting, but is the one that fits the less.
The other point of course is a conclusion. I don't feel a decent conclusion can be reached, and that might be your show stopper there. Or maybe you just need more development. When I've written a piece, I've always had the conclusion in mind before staring, and go backwards from it. Then I clear up some ideas in the way and maybe even modify or enrich the conclusion by it, but I've never worked the other way around. If that is your case I wouldn't know what to recommend. Otherwise, I'd recommend listing the relevant points of your conclusion and developing each into a paragraph, then find the themes they have in common and develop those. Maybe just a list of ideas and order them in a way that is logical to you, the rewrite all that is needed.
The point of the article is to be informative about the many American stereotypes featured in Japanese video games. In theory, there is no way to conclude an article like this as its push is to inform the reader about the topic at hand, and the reader chooses where to take it or end it from there. If you're referring to an ending to the article itself, I haven't added that yet as I feel like more could be added. I have a couple of characters in mind right now that I'd like to add, and once I feel like the points made in their entries are strong enough, then I'll work on a big-bang closing.
Brainstorming this right now.I feel that the body should have more meat than the introduction. I feel that stronger cases are needed, in order to support your thesis.
Just to answer one of your worries. I read it and anyone who would think that is racist is wound a BIT too tight. Don't worry about getting in trouble for talking about the Japanese, because they don't care. And as for the American thing, people wouldn't generally care about that either (unless they are in the wound-to-tight class). You shouldn't worry about that article being racist at all, since it isn't offensive in the least bit.
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Uh... rare indeed would be this moment used retro games can bring more than original prices.To be able to purchase a title that usually goes online as an import for about sixty bucks, can be purchased for a mere five bucks in some bargain bin.
'wacky' is a subjective term. Please define.Japanese TV is wacky, always reality-based, subways and buildings as far as the eye can see, vending machines that serve coffee and panties, etcetera, etcetera. I've heard and read all of it.
Subways and buildings as far as the eye can see IN TOKYO and OSAKA only. The rest of the country is endless countryside.
I have seen panties in vending machine since the mid 90s.
Not sure what movies you have been watching, but this is not representative of general Japanese cinema. Typical Japanese cinematic fare is slow-paced chic-flick melodramas centering on high school, family (especially post-war Japan), or 'friends'. 'Friend' movies have been BIG since around 2000. It's almost sickening.To be able to purchase a title that usually goes online as an import for about sixty bucks, can be purchased for a mere five bucks in some bargain bin.
But I always find myself asking; is Japan everything it's made out to be? I've heard the same things from different groups of people. Japanese TV is wacky, always reality-based, subways and buildings as far as the eye can see, vending machines that serve coffee and panties, etcetera, etcetera. I've heard and read all of it.
Beyond this note right here, I am not even touching this.thirteen year-old girls dressing up as a prostitute and singing in terrible English
And I am not going to continue to go through this piece. Sorry. Hard to read.
Jim, I have great respect for your effort. You get an A. For your knowledge of current Japanese culture... well, let's just focus on that A for effort.
You may ask my qualifications on the subject and you'd be right in doing so, so without trying to sound too much like I am blowing my own horn: 10 years of living and working in Japan, married with children (to a Japanese woman), graduated from CalState Long Beach with a degree in Japanese (and currently working on translation qualifications), and have been travelling back and forth between Japan and the US (my home) for 20 years as of 2009.
I hope you don't take all that as me trying to sound like a jerk. I just think you need to reconsider your research a little. Hope that helps.
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Although the piece was well written, I disagree with much of it. I think Japanese misunderstanding of American culture isn't any worse than American misunderstanding of Japanese culture.
Just because you know about Japanese culture doesn't not mean that anyone else does.
The only other thing that got to me was when you mentioned Japan in the 1960's. While I'm not positive on this, I thought that japan was very similar to America in the 60's.
Just because you know about Japanese culture doesn't not mean that anyone else does.
The only other thing that got to me was when you mentioned Japan in the 1960's. While I'm not positive on this, I thought that japan was very similar to America in the 60's.
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Just wait and see.87th wrote:Cool. Which games are they, this time?
I personally go for the games that are somewhat known or heard of and can be easily purchased. I feel a lot of the games featured on the site are obscure and hard to come by unless you really feel the need to import or download illegally.
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It's a good idea. One of the main reasons I've been so insistent that people buy God Hand, recently, is that I expect it will become quite rare very soon. It's bound to become highly sought-after in the future, due to its enthusiastic fans and status as Clover's last game.
I'd rather get people to find out about the game when the price is still low. I felt a little responsible when people were paying up to £120 to buy ICO, because they didn't know anything about it when it came out.
I'd rather get people to find out about the game when the price is still low. I felt a little responsible when people were paying up to £120 to buy ICO, because they didn't know anything about it when it came out.
Yeah, I feel so stupid about ICO, because the Game Crazy store near my house had four copies of the game, all of which were going for 12 bucks a piece. If I had bought at least one of the copies, I wouldn't have had to pay 70 bucks later on. I plan on getting God Hand, but I'm not sure where to find it. Maybe I'll just get it off of Amazon.com or someplace like that (it seems to be a bit hard to find in gamestores).87th wrote: I felt a little responsible when people were paying up to £120 to buy ICO, because they didn't know anything about it when it came out.
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MetalGear Solid 3: Snake Eater (PlayStation 2) [European]
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MetalGear AC!D2 (PSP) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - 1st Edition (PlayStation 2) [Japanese]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - Promo copy (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - 1st Edition (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid: Digital Graphic Novel (PSP) [European]
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MetalGear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots - Limited Edition (+ Bonus Disc, Soundtrack and 6" Old Snake Action Figure) [European]
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Zone Of the Enders (PlayStation 2) [European]
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boktai: The Sun Is In Your Hand! (Gameboy Advance) [European]
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When I write something, I make sure to question whether the work I'm doing will make a point or get a message across. When I wrote my God Hand article, I wanted to put the spotlight on Clover's last game (which was later revealed to be outsourced to another development house, meaning Okami is the last real Clover game). Clover is a company that is relevant to this industry for reasons I think are pretty obvious. Their designs were innovative, their game play was finely tuned, and their work overall was done with care. They were the last of their breed, and now they're dead and gone (and I'm aware of SEEDS/Platinum Games).87th wrote:It's a good idea. One of the main reasons I've been so insistent that people buy God Hand, recently, is that I expect it will become quite rare very soon. It's bound to become highly sought-after in the future, due to its enthusiastic fans and status as Clover's last game.
I stopped working on the Japan/US article because I couldn't get my message clear enough while still entertaining. I didn't have the time to punch it up or anything. In addition, the message would probably fall on deaf ears as people miss the irony and bash me for stereotyping Japan as shown earlier. Believe it or not, I actually have a whole folder of written work that I started then stopped because of this.
The only thing I do not like about HG 101 is that a lot of the authors focus too much on obscure Japanese games. I can understand that a lot of people might be interested in that, but I feel that the works are usually done without a purpose. A lot of the featured games seem like they were only mentioned because they are obscure and, well, Japanese. I don't feel like a lot of those games are relevant whatsoever. I enjoy a lot of the work on the site though, which is what attracted me to writing stuff for it.
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MetalGear Solid: Premium Pack (PlayStation) [European]
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MetalGear: Ghost Babel (Gameboy Color) [European]
MetalGear: Ghost Babel (Gameboy Color) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Sons Of Liberty (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance (PlayStation 2) [Japanese]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance + The Document of MGS2 (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance (Xbox) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance (PC) [European]
MetalGear AC!D (PSP) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Snake Eater (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Snake Eater - Premium Pack (PlayStation 2) [Japanese]
MetalGear AC!D2 (PSP) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - 1st Edition (PlayStation 2) [Japanese]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - Promo copy (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - 1st Edition (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid: Digital Graphic Novel (PSP) [European]
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MetalGear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots - Limited Edition (+ Bonus Disc, Soundtrack and 6" Old Snake Action Figure) [European]
SNATCHER SERIES
Snatcher (Mega CD) [European]
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POLICENAUTS SERIES
Policenauts Pilot Disk (3DO) [Japanese]
Policenauts (3DO) [Japanese]
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Policenauts (Saturn) [Japanese]
ZONE OF THE ENDERS SERIES
Zone Of the Enders (PlayStation 2) [European]
Zone Of the Enders: The Second Runner - Special Edition (PlayStation 2) [European]
BOKTAI SERIES
boktai: The Sun Is In Your Hand! (Gameboy Advance) [European]
boktai 2: Solar Boy Django (Gameboy Advance) [European]
OTHER SERIES
Penguin Adventure (MSX) [European]
Kabushiki Baibai Trainer Kabutore (DS) [Japanese]
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Konami Krazy Racers (Gameboy Advance) [European]
Super Smash Bros. Brawl (Wii) [American] - PSN: eighty7th
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Personally, I quite like the site. I'd consider myself to be pretty hardcore already, but it's turned me onto stuff I hadn't even heard of. A lot of great games don't sell, but a lot of those get written about. I really enjoy finding games that haven't been so widely acknowledged by gamers.
I think there's a place for writing about hard-to-find classics, but the ignored games that are right in front of our faces are just as worthy of attention, if they're of the same level of quality, that is.
I think there's a place for writing about hard-to-find classics, but the ignored games that are right in front of our faces are just as worthy of attention, if they're of the same level of quality, that is.
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I guess it's one of those "agree to disagree" kind of things. I find a lot of the games mentioned on the site to be average at best (and definitely not worthy of 20 paragraph pieces), but there are a lot of great games featured that even I haven't heard of.87th wrote:Personally, I quite like the site. I'd consider myself to be pretty hardcore already, but it's turned me onto stuff I hadn't even heard of. A lot of great games don't sell, but a lot of those get written about. I really enjoy finding games that haven't been so widely acknowledged by gamers.
I think there's a place for writing about hard-to-find classics, but the ignored games that are right in front of our faces are just as worthy of attention, if they're of the same level of quality, that is.
- Henry Spencer
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Metal Gear: Ghost Babel (GB)
Metal Gear Solid (PSX)
Metal Gear Solid 2: Substance (PS2)
Metal Gear Solid 3: Subsistence (PS2)
Policenauts (Saturn/PSX/3DO)
Snatcher (PC Engine/Mega CD)
Zone Of The Enders (PS2)
Zone Of The Enders 2: Special Edition (PS2)
Super Smash Bros. Brawl; it counts, right? ;P - PSN: henryspencer666
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I love the website, since, as a gamer who is hard to please, I can find something I would really enjoy. The Strider series for example, is the best of its kind, if you ask me. Same goes for the Shinobi series. Both are long forgotten 2D series classics that deserve to be played. I wouldn't have even known Strider 2 for the Playstation even existed, since it has been publicised so little, yet, it's the greatest game of its kind for me. That was all thanks to me checking out the article on Hardcore Gaming 101. I've also had the pleasure of playing games like Snatcher, Klonoa, Rez, Psychonauts and Killer7 because of them. I wouldn't have been interested in such games, if it wasn't for their articles.
Definitely the only resource for games that I go for, since I've played just about every mainstream game I'd ever be interested in, and don't need some website telling me what to play and what not to; HG101 just tell you what the game is actually like, without force feeding me whether you should play it or not.
Plus they've just posted a Streets Of Rage article. HG101 do, now and then, give their thoughts about classic series such as that. They've been adding entries on Final Fantasy lately, as well. So yeah, I think it's a great website overall.
Definitely the only resource for games that I go for, since I've played just about every mainstream game I'd ever be interested in, and don't need some website telling me what to play and what not to; HG101 just tell you what the game is actually like, without force feeding me whether you should play it or not.
Plus they've just posted a Streets Of Rage article. HG101 do, now and then, give their thoughts about classic series such as that. They've been adding entries on Final Fantasy lately, as well. So yeah, I think it's a great website overall.
- 87th
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- Favorite Game: MetalGear 2: Solid Snake
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MetalGear (MSX2) [European]
MetalGear (NES) [European]
MetalGear (Famicom) [Japanese]
MetalGear 2: Solid Snake (MSX2) [Japanese]
Snake's Revenge (NES) [European]
MetalGear Solid (PlayStation) [European]
MetalGear Solid: Premium Pack (PlayStation) [European]
MetalGear Solid: Integral (PlayStation) [Japanese]
MetalGear: Ghost Babel (Gameboy Color) [European]
MetalGear: Ghost Babel (Gameboy Color) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Sons Of Liberty (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance (PlayStation 2) [Japanese]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance + The Document of MGS2 (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance (Xbox) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance (PC) [European]
MetalGear AC!D (PSP) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Snake Eater (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Snake Eater - Premium Pack (PlayStation 2) [Japanese]
MetalGear AC!D2 (PSP) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - 1st Edition (PlayStation 2) [Japanese]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - Promo copy (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - 1st Edition (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid: Digital Graphic Novel (PSP) [European]
MetalGear Solid: Portable Ops (PSP) [American]
MetalGear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots - Limited Edition (+ Bonus Disc, Soundtrack and 6" Old Snake Action Figure) [European]
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Snatcher (Mega CD) [European]
Snatcher (Saturn) [Japanese]
POLICENAUTS SERIES
Policenauts Pilot Disk (3DO) [Japanese]
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Policenauts (PlayStation) [Japanese]
Policenauts (Saturn) [Japanese]
Policenauts (Saturn) [Japanese]
ZONE OF THE ENDERS SERIES
Zone Of the Enders (PlayStation 2) [European]
Zone Of the Enders: The Second Runner - Special Edition (PlayStation 2) [European]
BOKTAI SERIES
boktai: The Sun Is In Your Hand! (Gameboy Advance) [European]
boktai 2: Solar Boy Django (Gameboy Advance) [European]
OTHER SERIES
Penguin Adventure (MSX) [European]
Kabushiki Baibai Trainer Kabutore (DS) [Japanese]
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Konami Krazy Racers (Gameboy Advance) [European]
Super Smash Bros. Brawl (Wii) [American] - PSN: eighty7th
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Actually, after reading HG 101's writing submission guidelines, I'm quite tempted to submit a couple of articles about some of Goichi Suda's earlier games, and maybe a couple other things. The idea of bringing up a balanced article about a game that has been overrated by the hardcore crowd appeals to me. It'd mean playing buying the Japanese/American releases of a few games that I didn't really think too much of, though.
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I would very much appreciate this. I kind of want to play Flower, Sun, and Rain. Not so interested in the Twilight games, and I've already played Fire Pro.87th wrote:Actually, after reading HG 101's writing submission guidelines, I'm quite tempted to submit a couple of articles about some of Goichi Suda's earlier games, and maybe a couple other things. The idea of bringing up a balanced article about a game that has been overrated by the hardcore crowd appeals to me. It'd mean playing buying the Japanese/American releases of a few games that I didn't really think too much of, though.
- 87th
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- Posts: 2150
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- Favorite Game: MetalGear 2: Solid Snake
- Kojima games owned: METALGEAR SERIES
MetalGear (MSX2) [European]
MetalGear (NES) [European]
MetalGear (Famicom) [Japanese]
MetalGear 2: Solid Snake (MSX2) [Japanese]
Snake's Revenge (NES) [European]
MetalGear Solid (PlayStation) [European]
MetalGear Solid: Premium Pack (PlayStation) [European]
MetalGear Solid: Integral (PlayStation) [Japanese]
MetalGear: Ghost Babel (Gameboy Color) [European]
MetalGear: Ghost Babel (Gameboy Color) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Sons Of Liberty (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance (PlayStation 2) [Japanese]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance + The Document of MGS2 (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance (Xbox) [European]
MetalGear Solid 2: Substance (PC) [European]
MetalGear AC!D (PSP) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Snake Eater (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Snake Eater - Premium Pack (PlayStation 2) [Japanese]
MetalGear AC!D2 (PSP) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - 1st Edition (PlayStation 2) [Japanese]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - Promo copy (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid 3: Subsistence - 1st Edition (PlayStation 2) [European]
MetalGear Solid: Digital Graphic Novel (PSP) [European]
MetalGear Solid: Portable Ops (PSP) [American]
MetalGear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots - Limited Edition (+ Bonus Disc, Soundtrack and 6" Old Snake Action Figure) [European]
SNATCHER SERIES
Snatcher (Mega CD) [European]
Snatcher (Saturn) [Japanese]
POLICENAUTS SERIES
Policenauts Pilot Disk (3DO) [Japanese]
Policenauts (3DO) [Japanese]
Policenauts (PlayStation) [Japanese]
Policenauts (Saturn) [Japanese]
Policenauts (Saturn) [Japanese]
ZONE OF THE ENDERS SERIES
Zone Of the Enders (PlayStation 2) [European]
Zone Of the Enders: The Second Runner - Special Edition (PlayStation 2) [European]
BOKTAI SERIES
boktai: The Sun Is In Your Hand! (Gameboy Advance) [European]
boktai 2: Solar Boy Django (Gameboy Advance) [European]
OTHER SERIES
Penguin Adventure (MSX) [European]
Kabushiki Baibai Trainer Kabutore (DS) [Japanese]
KOJIMA-RELATED GAMES
Konami Krazy Racers (Gameboy Advance) [European]
Super Smash Bros. Brawl (Wii) [American] - PSN: eighty7th
- Wii Friend Code: 4890580757769739
- Location: Zanzibarland
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I'll wait until the DS versions of Flower, Sun & Rain and The Silver Case are out before doing them, but I could probably get a hold of the Japanese version of Michigan or the American Samurai Champloo soon and write something on them (not strictly Suda games, but he did work on them).
I'd like to start out with Sonic Pocket Adventure, but they prefer you to cover either standalone games or full series', so I'm unsure about it. I might do Donkey Kong Jungle Beat, but I need to get the right equipment to take screenshots, first. Annoyingly, I can't put a video card in my laptop, but I think one of my friends has a USB equivalent.
I'd like to start out with Sonic Pocket Adventure, but they prefer you to cover either standalone games or full series', so I'm unsure about it. I might do Donkey Kong Jungle Beat, but I need to get the right equipment to take screenshots, first. Annoyingly, I can't put a video card in my laptop, but I think one of my friends has a USB equivalent.